| Ubiquitous |
SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
Stephanie was the only one she could make attend. SLop decides she had such a
great time they're going to spend the day in their "cute" PJs, which SLop shows
us. PJs with "chicks rule" and "peas on earth" are so juvenile. SLop forgets
her faux niece's name and calls her Sandy, then starts making out with her as
we go to opening credits.
SLop heats some oil to saute some onions and tells us about a new way to cut
bell peppers; she cuts the top and bottom off, places it upright, and then
slices the sides off. She claims the seeds are pretty hot n spicy so you don't
want them in your hash. They're not what I would consider "hot 'n' spicy" by a
long shot, idiot.
She then adds a disguised can of beef broth to the pan (you can use chicken
too) and a packet of meat marinade, but it's actually taco seasoning. She then
takes the sliced corned beef and cubes it. She likes corned beef because it is
marinaded, then salted and sugared. She then shows us how to cube it by cutting
it, then turning it 90 degrees and cutting it again. Brilliant!
As the hash cooks, she tells us her secret to poaching eggs; adding white wine
vinegar to the water keeps them from spreading. Hmm, that's a lot of vinegar.
Won't that add a weird taste to them? It's a Moot Point™, however, because she
puts some biscuit cutters into the pan and then puts an egg into each. She
plates the hash and makes some depressions for the eggs. She retrieves the eggs
with a slotted spoon and nestles them into the hash. We go to commercial and
what the hell was that in those blue coffee mugs in the glamor shot?
As we return from commercial, SLop tells us she has to make something delicious
because they're going to be sitting around in their PJs all day. She crushes a
bag of already-crushed corn bran cereal with a rolling pin and puts it into a
pie pan. She then grabs an egg and buttermilk from the fridge and puts them
into another pan. For good measure she adds the leftover taco mix into a bag
with flour, admonishing us to thoroughly mix them together so we get an even
coating on the chicken. She then tells us the chicken strips should really stay
in the fridge until needed anyway and that she likes how they come in whatever
size she wants. Amazing! SLop confides that MS thinks chicken strips are fun to
eat. Where is she, anyway? She puts the strips into the egg mixture, then puts
the strips into the bag of flour mixture and shakes it until coated. She then
puts them back into the egg mixture (yikes!) then into the cereal before frying
them in the oil. Slop washes off her tongs (but not hands) to keep everything
really clean and healthy.
SLop puts some tater tots onto a baking sheet with some Misses Dash so that her
nieces and nephews eat less ketchup, whatever THAT means. SLop plates the
chicken onto a serving plate covered with blue paper towels. As we goto
commercial, she bites into one and tells us about her tangy assy dipping
sauces.
SLop blames MS's mom for the cheesy potato recipe which she claims taste like
twice-baked potatoes and tells us you can use whatever type of frozen potato
product you wish. She puts the 'tots into a casserole and tops it with
pre-shredded cheese, crumbles bacon on top, and tells us how the cheese and
bacon juice will bake into it and mix throughout. Well, it would if you had
mixed it INTO the 'tots instead of putting it on top. SLop returns the
casserole to the baking sheet but lines it with foil so the bottom doesn't get
mucked up.
She makes some dipping sauce by mixing 4 parts ketchup, 2 parts honey, and dash
of Worcestershire sauce in a large bowl, then pours it into a ramican. She also
makes a honey mustard sauce in another large bowl and then pours it into a
ramican. Why didnt she just put into them in the first place?
She pulls out the potatoes and sprinkles them with sour cream and green onion.
She then plates some for herself because she claims MS eats them all before she
can get any. She tells us about a game MS invented (newsflash: it's called
"backgammon"), pops a big piece of those fresh-from-the-oven-potatoes into her
mouth, and then makes a quick exit, stage left. Third degree burns are a bitch,
bitch!
SLop tells us that presentation is important, which is why she got some ugly
flower shaped dishes for the lemon ice from her mass merchandiser. Does this
mean I can't make this without them? She mixes a can of frozen lemon aid and
some lemon jello in blender (too much will make it too strong!), then adds ice
and sugar before mixing it. While the blender is running she takes the lid off
and takes a peek. I would have loved to her get a face full of lemon ice right
then!
We return to the room MS was imprisoned just in time to see SLop give her a
lemon ice. MS gives a feeble "Yay!" and then, at SLop's prompting, offers her
tip; a candy backgammon board. MS looks like she's been heavily sedated, or
maybe SLop slipped her one of her cocktails by mistake. As MS explains how to
make the board, the background music suddenly cuts out for a sec. SLop prompts
MS if she can eat the green and yellow candies she uses for playing pieces when
finished, to which MS weakly replies "If you like". SLop gives her closing line
when we suddenly see a close up of MS's hand grabbing what looks like a small
metal can of mace that was hidden behind her with an almost pyschotic-sounding
"I got a surprise for you!" voice over, followed by a spraying noise and SLop
screaming. OMG! MS has gone psycho! Alas, we cut to a medium shot of MS
spraying her "aunt" with silly string. Oh well.
--
WARNING!!!
Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget, standing in
your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We assume no
liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the "food" or
being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure where she grew up
either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss Lee.
|
|
|
| Bell Jar |
dude ... are you her Ex?
"Ubiquitous" <weberm@polaris.net> wrote in message
news:GYWdnRNTQYygMXvfRVn-rQ@comcast.com...
> SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
> Stephanie was the only one she could make attend. SLop decides she had
> such a
> great time they're going to spend the day in their "cute" PJs, which SLop
> shows
> us. PJs with "chicks rule" and "peas on earth" are so juvenile. SLop
> forgets
> her faux niece's name and calls her Sandy, then starts making out with her
> as
> we go to opening credits.
>
> SLop heats some oil to saute some onions and tells us about a new way to
> cut
> bell peppers; she cuts the top and bottom off, places it upright, and then
> slices the sides off. She claims the seeds are pretty hot n spicy so you
> don't
> want them in your hash. They're not what I would consider "hot 'n' spicy"
> by a
> long shot, idiot.
>
> She then adds a disguised can of beef broth to the pan (you can use
> chicken
> too) and a packet of meat marinade, but it's actually taco seasoning. She
> then
> takes the sliced corned beef and cubes it. She likes corned beef because
> it is
> marinaded, then salted and sugared. She then shows us how to cube it by
> cutting
> it, then turning it 90 degrees and cutting it again. Brilliant!
>
> As the hash cooks, she tells us her secret to poaching eggs; adding white
> wine
> vinegar to the water keeps them from spreading. Hmm, that's a lot of
> vinegar.
> Won't that add a weird taste to them? It's a Moot PointT, however, because
> she
> puts some biscuit cutters into the pan and then puts an egg into each. She
> plates the hash and makes some depressions for the eggs. She retrieves the
> eggs
> with a slotted spoon and nestles them into the hash. We go to commercial
> and
> what the hell was that in those blue coffee mugs in the glamor shot?
>
> As we return from commercial, SLop tells us she has to make something
> delicious
> because they're going to be sitting around in their PJs all day. She
> crushes a
> bag of already-crushed corn bran cereal with a rolling pin and puts it
> into a
> pie pan. She then grabs an egg and buttermilk from the fridge and puts
> them
> into another pan. For good measure she adds the leftover taco mix into a
> bag
> with flour, admonishing us to thoroughly mix them together so we get an
> even
> coating on the chicken. She then tells us the chicken strips should really
> stay
> in the fridge until needed anyway and that she likes how they come in
> whatever
> size she wants. Amazing! SLop confides that MS thinks chicken strips are
> fun to
> eat. Where is she, anyway? She puts the strips into the egg mixture, then
> puts
> the strips into the bag of flour mixture and shakes it until coated. She
> then
> puts them back into the egg mixture (yikes!) then into the cereal before
> frying
> them in the oil. Slop washes off her tongs (but not hands) to keep
> everything
> really clean and healthy.
>
> SLop puts some tater tots onto a baking sheet with some Misses Dash so
> that her
> nieces and nephews eat less ketchup, whatever THAT means. SLop plates the
> chicken onto a serving plate covered with blue paper towels. As we goto
> commercial, she bites into one and tells us about her tangy assy dipping
> sauces.
>
> SLop blames MS's mom for the cheesy potato recipe which she claims taste
> like
> twice-baked potatoes and tells us you can use whatever type of frozen
> potato
> product you wish. She puts the 'tots into a casserole and tops it with
> pre-shredded cheese, crumbles bacon on top, and tells us how the cheese
> and
> bacon juice will bake into it and mix throughout. Well, it would if you
> had
> mixed it INTO the 'tots instead of putting it on top. SLop returns the
> casserole to the baking sheet but lines it with foil so the bottom doesn't
> get
> mucked up.
>
> She makes some dipping sauce by mixing 4 parts ketchup, 2 parts honey, and
> dash
> of Worcestershire sauce in a large bowl, then pours it into a ramican. She
> also
> makes a honey mustard sauce in another large bowl and then pours it into a
> ramican. Why didnt she just put into them in the first place?
>
> She pulls out the potatoes and sprinkles them with sour cream and green
> onion.
> She then plates some for herself because she claims MS eats them all
> before she
> can get any. She tells us about a game MS invented (newsflash: it's called
> "backgammon"), pops a big piece of those fresh-from-the-oven-potatoes into
> her
> mouth, and then makes a quick exit, stage left. Third degree burns are a
> bitch,
> bitch!
>
> SLop tells us that presentation is important, which is why she got some
> ugly
> flower shaped dishes for the lemon ice from her mass merchandiser. Does
> this
> mean I can't make this without them? She mixes a can of frozen lemon aid
> and
> some lemon jello in blender (too much will make it too strong!), then adds
> ice
> and sugar before mixing it. While the blender is running she takes the lid
> off
> and takes a peek. I would have loved to her get a face full of lemon ice
> right
> then!
>
> We return to the room MS was imprisoned just in time to see SLop give her
> a
> lemon ice. MS gives a feeble "Yay!" and then, at SLop's prompting, offers
> her
> tip; a candy backgammon board. MS looks like she's been heavily sedated,
> or
> maybe SLop slipped her one of her cocktails by mistake. As MS explains how
> to
> make the board, the background music suddenly cuts out for a sec. SLop
> prompts
> MS if she can eat the green and yellow candies she uses for playing pieces
> when
> finished, to which MS weakly replies "If you like". SLop gives her closing
> line
> when we suddenly see a close up of MS's hand grabbing what looks like a
> small
> metal can of mace that was hidden behind her with an almost
> pyschotic-sounding
> "I got a surprise for you!" voice over, followed by a spraying noise and
> SLop
> screaming. OMG! MS has gone psycho! Alas, we cut to a medium shot of MS
> spraying her "aunt" with silly string. Oh well.
>
> --
> WARNING!!!
> Use of these recipes may be hazardous to your health, food budget,
> standing in
> your community and liver function. Use at your own risk!! We assume no
> liability from any illness or injury sustained while eating the "food" or
> being exposed to crapass tablescapes. And no, we're not sure where she
> grew up
> either. The Cordon Bleu disavows any knowlege of Miss Lee.
>
>
>
|
|
|
| Default User |
Bell Jar wrote:
> dude ... are you her Ex?
Wasn't the original post from last January or so?
Brian
|
|
|
| Brick |
On 26-Jul-2005, weberm@polaris.net (Ubiquitous) wrote:
> SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
> Stephanie was the only one she could make attend.
<snip a pathetic piece of drivel>
What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
about a cooking show host. Don't you wish you were making the kind of
money that she is?
--
The Brick said that (Don't bother to agree with me, I have already changed
my mind.)
----== Posted via Newsfeeds.Com - Unlimited-Uncensored-Secure Usenet News==----
http://www.newsfeeds.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 120,000+ Newsgroups
----= East and West-Coast Server Farms - Total Privacy via Encryption =----
|
|
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| Goomba38 |
Brick wrote:
>
> What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
> about a cooking show host. Don't you wish you were making the kind of
> money that she is?
I've enjoyed the observations about Sandra Lee. And since when did
making more money equate with higher quality or intelligence?
Goomba
|
|
|
| Nancy Young |
"Goomba38" <Goomba38@comcast.net> wrote in message
news:4PadnV11pv_4RXvfRVn-3A@comcast.com...
> Brick wrote:
>> What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
>> about a cooking show host. Don't you wish you were making the kind of
>> money that she is?
>
> I've enjoyed the observations about Sandra Lee. And since when did making
> more money equate with higher quality or intelligence?
I think it's funny, especially when he (?) notices the same things I do.
Just for a laugh, nothing for anyone to get excited about. The posts
are clearly marked.
nancy
|
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|
| olivia |
I love your reviews of SLop's show. Don't stop!
|
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| Glitter Ninja |
"Brick" <hrbricker@NOSPAM.ij.net> writes:
>What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
>about a cooking show host. Don't you wish you were making the kind of
>money that she is?
You know how you told the OP to just change the channel and not watch
the show? How about you just not read his posts, hmm? That might be
kind of hard to remember, so I suggest writing it on a post it note and
attaching it to your monitor.
Stacia
|
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| tsr3 |
Nah--Ubi isn't her ex--but sounds like Ubi asked Sandra on a date once,
and she told Ubi to go pound sand up him/her/its ass.
|
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| davincifan@earthlink.net |
Brick wrote:
> On 26-Jul-2005, weberm@polaris.net (Ubiquitous) wrote:
>
> > SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
> > Stephanie was the only one she could make attend.
>
> <snip a pathetic piece of drivel>
>
> What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
> about a cooking show host. Don't you wish you were making the kind of
> money that she is?
What does money have to do with quality, intelligence, humor, etc.? If
Ubi's postings disturb you don't read them.
I enjoy Ubi's posts and catch SL's show when I can. I swore I wouldn't
watch them anymore(the planning & execution is so bad) but the show's
like the attraction of a train wreck.
Mac
|
|
|
| sf |
Did you notice who chimed in to tell you you're all wrong?
`````````````````````
On Wed, 27 Jul 2005 00:36:34 GMT, Brick wrote:
>
> On 26-Jul-2005, weberm@polaris.net (Ubiquitous) wrote:
>
> > SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
> > Stephanie was the only one she could make attend.
>
> <snip a pathetic piece of drivel>
>
> What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
> about a cooking show host. Don't you wish you were making the kind of
> money that she is?
|
|
|
| Ruth Mckee |
In article <42e6d818$1_1@spool9-west.superfeed.net>, hrbricker@NOSPAM.ij.net
wrote:
>On 26-Jul-2005, weberm@polaris.net (Ubiquitous) wrote:
>> SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
>> Stephanie was the only one she could make attend.
>
><snip a pathetic piece of drivel>
>
>What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
>about a cooking show host.
so why are you reading his reviews?
>Don't you wish you were making the kind of money that she is?
by marrying it?
|
|
|
| Nancy Young |
"sf" <sf@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:0d7ee1djvue578c56nco8p17f6u4n4tl9t@4ax.com...
>
> Did you notice who chimed in to tell you you're all wrong?
Who?
nancy
|
|
|
| Rob. |
"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:3knruuFv1h9aU1@individual.net...
> Bell Jar wrote:
>
>> dude ... are you her Ex?
>
> Wasn't the original post from last January or so?
>
>
>
> Brian
Yes, he or she has recycled the rants, hey, guess it is summer reruns after
all! LOL
p.s. expect the usual replies, don't read the post, ( I don't) don't read
the replies, that I do just to see some like yours. LOL Rob
|
|
|
| ecsmith |
Ruth Mckee wrote:
> In article <42e6d818$1_1@spool9-west.superfeed.net>, hrbricker@NOSPAM.ij.net
> wrote:
>
>>On 26-Jul-2005, weberm@polaris.net (Ubiquitous) wrote:
>
>
>>>SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor Miss
>>>Stephanie was the only one she could make attend.
>>
>><snip a pathetic piece of drivel>
>>
>>What a pathetic ass you are for belaboring us with your adolescent rant
>>about a cooking show host.
>
>
> so why are you reading his reviews?
>
>
>>Don't you wish you were making the kind of money that she is?
>
>
> by marrying it?
>
Apparently she made her own money by suckering you shop-at-home-loser
types. Oddly enough.
|
|
|
| Nick |
Ubiquitous wrote:
> SLop tells us that she just had a slumber party, but apparently poor
> Miss Stephanie was the only one she could make attend. SLop decides
> she had such a great time they're going to spend the day in their
> "cute" PJs,
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmsandraleeinpjsmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Try watching with the sound turned all the way down.
The woman is HAWT!
> SLop blames MS's mom for the cheesy potato recipe which she claims
> taste like twice-baked potatoes and tells us you can use whatever
> type of frozen potato product you wish. She puts the 'tots into a
> casserole and tops it with pre-shredded cheese, crumbles bacon on
> top, and tells us how the cheese and bacon juice will bake into it
> and mix throughout.
Ok, you left out what I think was the most unusual thing in the episode.
She opened up the refrigerator and pulled out a plate full of cooked bacon
that she said was left over from the day before. There is no such thing
as left over bacon at my house.
|
|
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| record.hunter@gmail.com |
tsr3 wrote:
> Nah--Ubi isn't her ex--but sounds like Ubi asked Sandra on a date once,
> and she told Ubi to go pound sand up him/her/its ass.
Not sand. A can of potatoes.
|
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| record.hunter@gmail.com |
Nick wrote:
> The woman is HAWT!
>
How can you tell in such soft-focus lighting?
|
|
|
| Nick |
wrote:
> Nick wrote:
>
>> The woman is HAWT!
>>
>
> How can you tell in such soft-focus lighting?
I am gifted like that.
|
|
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| record.hunter@gmail.com |
Nick wrote:
> wrote:
> > Nick wrote:
> >
> >> The woman is HAWT!
> >>
> >
> > How can you tell in such soft-focus lighting?
>
> I am gifted like that.
She is all yours. I wish it were possible for you to take her home,
never to soft-focus our airwaves again. She is nothing but excrescence,
foodshowwise.
|
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| sf |
On Wed, 27 Jul 2005 07:02:10 -0400, Nancy Young wrote:
>
> "sf" <sf@gmail.com> wrote in message
> news:0d7ee1djvue578c56nco8p17f6u4n4tl9t@4ax.com...
> >
> > Did you notice who chimed in to tell you you're all wrong?
>
> Who?
>
> nancy
>
:)
|
|
|
| Default User |
Rob. wrote:
>
> "Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:3knruuFv1h9aU1@individual.net...
> > Bell Jar wrote:
> >
> >> dude ... are you her Ex?
> >
> > Wasn't the original post from last January or so?
> >
> >
> >
> > Brian
>
>
> Yes, he or she has recycled the rants, hey, guess it is summer reruns
> after all! LOL
Thought maybe I was just having Deja Vooooo.
> p.s. expect the usual replies, don't read the post, ( I don't) don't
> read the replies, that I do just to see some like yours. LOL Rob
I have Ubi killfiled, but the other guy thoughtfully (not) quoted the
whole thing for his one-liner.
Brian
|
|
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| ANIM8Rfsk |
in article Xns96A058B3C627Bndtcm@204.153.244.170, Nick at
nickSPAMMENOT@snurcher.com wrote on 7/27/05 6:43 AM:
> wrote:
>> Nick wrote:
>>
>>> The woman is HAWT!
>>>
>>
>> How can you tell in such soft-focus lighting?
>
> I am gifted like that.
I'm thinking she just splattered every lens they had.
|
|
|
| Nancy Young |
"sf" <sf@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:asife1dt476aigrfqu3qcd3dqpvfl44m9a@4ax.com...
> On Wed, 27 Jul 2005 07:02:10 -0400, Nancy Young wrote:
>
>>
>> "sf" <sf@gmail.com> wrote in message
>> news:0d7ee1djvue578c56nco8p17f6u4n4tl9t@4ax.com...
>> >
>> > Did you notice who chimed in to tell you you're all wrong?
>>
>> Who?
> :)
Where did I say he was wrong?
nancy
|
|
|
| charles381@webtv.net |
Thanks for the blow by blow of the show.
But I think we can do without your comments.
Why don't you just sit back and watch like
most of us do?
<html><body bgcolor="black"
text="white"></html>
|
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| Pan Ohco |
On 28 Jul 2005 12:55:14 GMT, Nick wrote:
>h0n0r wrote:
>
>> http://www.calendars.com/xq/asp/PID.../qx/product.htm
>> There's a SLop calendar? I had no idea.
>
>Please tell me this is at least a swimsuit calendar.
Nick that's what I was hoping, but unfortunately it's a cooking
calendar. Her swimsuit calendar would be better then her cooking
calendar.
Pan Ohco
|
|
|
| record.hunter@gmail.com |
Pan Ohco wrote:
>
> Nick that's what I was hoping, but unfortunately it's a cooking
> calendar. Her swimsuit calendar would be better then her cooking
> calendar.
>
Bill O'Reilly's swimsuit calendar would be better than SLop's cooking.
|
|
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| sd |
In article <14534-42E7F925-87@storefull-3136.bay.webtv.net>,
charles381@webtv.net wrote:
> Thanks for the blow by blow of the show.
> But I think we can do without your comments.
>
> Why don't you just sit back and watch like
> most of us do?
After reading a few of Ubiquitous' "critiques," I had the
opportunity to watch a couple of actual shows. SL's pretty sad.
Ubiquitous' accounts are way funnier than the show. Keep posting 'em!
sd
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