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The Joneses

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Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:

YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:
You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.
You have more than 300 C and D batteries in your kitchen drawer.
Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti Os.
You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood
covering your windows.
Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written in Sharpie on your arms.
You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home Depot.
You are delighted to pay $4 for a gallon of regular unleaded.
The road leading to your house has been declared a No-Wake Zone.
You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom of the
pool.
You own more than three large coolers.
You can wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and not feel the
least bit guilty about it.
Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain; today you can
assemble a portable generator by candlelight.
You catch a 13-pound Red fish. In your driveway.
You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.
You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists who work
at the Weather channel.
Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof.
Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer, fence builder or a
tree worker.
A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center.
You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit during the summer.
Your child's first words are "hunker down" and you didn't go to
Georgia!
Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's
Christmas.
Toilet Paper is elevated to king of the realm at the shelters.
At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy with the biggest
chainsaw.

--------------44FFDAC17CAB7AF64FDAE707
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Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit

<!doctype html public "-//w3c//dtd html 4.0 transitional//en">
<html>
<body link="#0000FF" vlink="#800080" lang="EN-US">

<div class=Section1>Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:

YOU
KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:
 You have FEMA's number on your speed
dialer.
 You have more than 300 C and D batteries
in your kitchen drawer.
 Your pantry contains more than 20
cans of Spaghetti Os.
 You are thinking of repainting your
house to match the plywood covering your windows.
 Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written
in Sharpie on your arms.
 You are on a first-name basis with
the cashier at Home Depot.
 You are delighted to pay $4 for a
gallon of regular unleaded.
 The road leading to your house has
been declared a No-Wake Zone.
 You decide that your patio furniture
looks better on the bottom of the pool.
 You own more than three large coolers.
 You can wish that other people get
hit by a hurricane and not feel the least bit guilty about it.
 Three months ago you couldn't hang
a shower curtain; today you can assemble a portable generator by
candlelight.
 You catch a 13-pound Red fish. In
your driveway.
 You have had tuna fish more than 5
days in a row.
 You can rattle off the names of three
or more meteorologists who work at the Weather channel.
 Someone comes to your door to tell
you they found your roof.
 Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
 You've been laughed at over the phone
by a roofer, fence builder or a tree worker.
 A battery powered TV is considered
a home entertainment center.
 You don't worry about relatives wanting
to visit during the summer.
 Your child's first words are "hunker
down" and you didn't go to Georgia!
 Having a tree in your living room
does not necessarily mean it's Christmas.
 Toilet Paper is elevated to king of
the realm at the shelters.
 At cocktail parties, women are attracted
to the guy with the biggest chainsaw.
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:12.0pt"></div>
</div>

</body>
</html>

--------------44FFDAC17CAB7AF64FDAE707--

Sheldon

The Joneses wrote:
> Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:
>
> YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:

<lotsa weak alibis snipped>

And the No. 1 reason you know you live in Florida is because you spend
the better part of every day, and cry yourself to sleep each night,
wishing you were back in New York. But now that you're priced out
because you sold your nice solid brick NYC tudor (with full basement) ,
that appreciated some 23% each year, you can never come back... that
$60,000 FL bungalo (what's a basement) you spent your last dime on five
years ago is now worth a whopping $65,000... IF you can sell it,
because there are millions for sale on that piece of fercocktah
reclaimed swamp just like it... you'd gladly trade the alligators that
a month after you arrived ate your dog and the unbearably hot n' humid
nine month long summers for Broadway shows and NY snows, especially to
get away from all those redneck hillybilly trailer-trash bible
thumpers... you'd trade in a NY second. But alas, you're screwed.

Sheldon

Gregory Morrow

Sheldon wrote:

> The Joneses wrote:
> > Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:
> >
> > YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:
>
> <lotsa weak alibis snipped>
>
> And the No. 1 reason you know you live in Florida is because you spend
> the better part of every day, and cry yourself to sleep each night,
> wishing you were back in New York. But now that you're priced out
> because you sold your nice solid brick NYC tudor (with full basement) ,
> that appreciated some 23% each year, you can never come back... that
> $60,000 FL bungalo (what's a basement) you spent your last dime on five
> years ago is now worth a whopping $65,000... IF you can sell it,
> because there are millions for sale on that piece of fercocktah
> reclaimed swamp just like it... you'd gladly trade the alligators that
> a month after you arrived ate your dog and the unbearably hot n' humid
> nine month long summers for Broadway shows and NY snows, especially to
> get away from all those redneck hillybilly trailer-trash bible
> thumpers... you'd trade in a NY second. But alas, you're screwed.

Florida is one place that I wouldn't mind seeing being hit with a huge
deluge and then just sink into the sea...it's a place that serves
absolutely NO useful purpose.

Years ago it had some interesting places, now it's just one giant freak
show (you can say the same about TX and CA too...). Too many people,
too much crime and corruption, too many Krazy Kubans, it's truly Third
World down there...IOW a BIG MESS.

Every single person I've known who has moved down to Florida (these
were younger folks) eventually has moved back up north here to
Chicawgo. They eventually couldn't STAND the place...pretty much the
same for Kalifornia too. And no one in their right mind would ever
even consider moving to Tejas...

Heck, years ago my folks even considered retiring down there for the
winter months. Tried it once, no go. They preferred the frozen plains
of Illannoy over Florida in winter...

--
Best
Greg

>
> Sheldon

On 3 Nov 2005 11:58:24 -0800, "Gregory Morrow" <gregorymorrow@earthlink.net>
wrote:

>

>Florida is one place that I wouldn't mind seeing being hit with a huge
>deluge and then just sink into the sea...it's a place that serves
>absolutely NO useful purpose.
>
Lots of folks in the Sunbelt say that about the NYC area.....
usually after a visit from New Yawkers.

We just listen for the loudest complaints,
and the Fran Dresher accent.

<rj>

Kathi Jones

"Sheldon" <PENMART01@aol.com> wrote in message
news:1131039435.790984.21540@o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com...
>
> The Joneses wrote:
> > Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:
> >
> > YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:
>
> <lotsa weak alibis snipped>
>
> And the No. 1 reason you know you live in Florida is because you spend
> the better part of every day, and cry yourself to sleep each night,
> wishing you were back in New York. But now that you're priced out
> because you sold your nice solid brick NYC tudor (with full basement) ,
> that appreciated some 23% each year, you can never come back... that
> $60,000 FL bungalo (what's a basement) you spent your last dime on five
> years ago is now worth a whopping $65,000... IF you can sell it,
> because there are millions for sale on that piece of fercocktah
> reclaimed swamp just like it... you'd gladly trade the alligators that
> a month after you arrived ate your dog and the unbearably hot n' humid
> nine month long summers for Broadway shows and NY snows, especially to
> get away from all those redneck hillybilly trailer-trash bible
> thumpers... you'd trade in a NY second. But alas, you're screwed.
>
> Sheldon
>

I've never been to Florida, but I sympathize. And I'm really sorry about
yer dawg....

Kathi,
a Canuck

kilikini

"Kathi Jones" <katjon@storm.ca> wrote in message
news:FIqdnWngPMm04_fenZ2dnUVZ_tqdnZ2d@storm.ca...
>
> "Sheldon" <PENMART01@aol.com> wrote in message
> news:1131039435.790984.21540@o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com...
> >
> > The Joneses wrote:
> > > Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:
> > >
> > > YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:
> >
> > <lotsa weak alibis snipped>
> >
> > And the No. 1 reason you know you live in Florida is because you spend
> > the better part of every day, and cry yourself to sleep each night,
> > wishing you were back in New York. But now that you're priced out
> > because you sold your nice solid brick NYC tudor (with full basement) ,
> > that appreciated some 23% each year, you can never come back... that
> > $60,000 FL bungalo (what's a basement) you spent your last dime on five
> > years ago is now worth a whopping $65,000... IF you can sell it,
> > because there are millions for sale on that piece of fercocktah
> > reclaimed swamp just like it... you'd gladly trade the alligators that
> > a month after you arrived ate your dog and the unbearably hot n' humid
> > nine month long summers for Broadway shows and NY snows, especially to
> > get away from all those redneck hillybilly trailer-trash bible
> > thumpers... you'd trade in a NY second. But alas, you're screwed.
> >
> > Sheldon
> >
>
> I've never been to Florida, but I sympathize. And I'm really sorry about
> yer dawg....
>
> Kathi,
> a Canuck
>
>
>

I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool of the
United States. I absolutely hate it here.

kili

Default User

kilikini wrote:

> I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
> of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.

Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.

Brian

--
If televison's a babysitter, the Internet is a drunk librarian who
won't shut up.
-- Dorothy Gambrell (http://catandgirl.com)

Sheldon

<RJ> wrote:
> On 3 Nov 2005 11:58:24 -0800, "Gregory Morrow" <gregorymorrow@earthlink.net>
> wrote:
>
> >
>
> >Florida is one place that I wouldn't mind seeing being hit with a huge
> >deluge and then just sink into the sea...it's a place that serves
> >absolutely NO useful purpose.
> >
> Lots of folks in the Sunbelt say that about the NYC area.....
> usually after a visit from New Yawkers.

Weren't for the Nor'easterner tourists arrriving with their full
wallets yoose Floridians would literally starve.

Florida is a fercocktah place with mostly substandard people living in
substandard housing that everyone else is forced to pay to rebuild, and
rebuld, and rebuild every time the wind blows. This putting good money
after bad has got to cease... please, folks... never send another cent
to bail out Floridian morons, idjits who don't know how to build a
house. WTF do yoose hillybillys do with all those tons of ice we send
you... moonshine maitai parties in your substandard trailers?

Sheldon

kilikini

"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:3svf45FqciqhU1@individual.net...
> kilikini wrote:
>
>
> > I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
> > of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.
>
>
> Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.
>
>
>
> Brian
>

Yep, too true, Brian.

kili

kilikini

"Sheldon" <PENMART01@aol.com> wrote in message
news:1131055372.059857.26100@f14g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
>
> <RJ> wrote:
> > On 3 Nov 2005 11:58:24 -0800, "Gregory Morrow"
<gregorymorrow@earthlink.net>
> > wrote:
> >
> > >
> >
> > >Florida is one place that I wouldn't mind seeing being hit with a huge
> > >deluge and then just sink into the sea...it's a place that serves
> > >absolutely NO useful purpose.
> > >
> > Lots of folks in the Sunbelt say that about the NYC area.....
> > usually after a visit from New Yawkers.
>
> Weren't for the Nor'easterner tourists arrriving with their full
> wallets yoose Floridians would literally starve.
>
> Florida is a fercocktah place with mostly substandard people living in
> substandard housing that everyone else is forced to pay to rebuild, and
> rebuld, and rebuild every time the wind blows. This putting good money
> after bad has got to cease... please, folks... never send another cent
> to bail out Floridian morons, idjits who don't know how to build a
> house. WTF do yoose hillybillys do with all those tons of ice we send
> you... moonshine maitai parties in your substandard trailers?
>
> Sheldon
>

The only "good" thing I can say about my move to Florida is that I live in a
concrete block house that has withstood plenty of hurricanes. If I had my
way, I'd be back in California, Oregon, Washington or Hawaii in a heartbeat.
I live in Cesspool, Swampy, Cowtown Florida. There is no deli, no theater,
no seafood and no decent restaurants. All we have are geriatric clinics and
bugs. It's seriously miserable.

kili

Pan Ohco

On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:25:07 GMT, kilikini wrote:

>
>"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>news:3svf45FqciqhU1@individual.net...
>> kilikini wrote:
>>
>>
>> > I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
>> > of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.
>>
>>
>> Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.
>>
>>
>>
>> Brian
>>
>
>Yep, too true, Brian.
>
>kili
>

Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
telling us how you did it where you used to be.

As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.

Pan Ohco

Kathi Jones

"Pan Ohco" <ohco@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:k15lm1toc3evhu72a7bbitu38f7sjd54td@4ax.com...
> On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:25:07 GMT, kilikini wrote:
>
> >
> >"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> >news:3svf45FqciqhU1@individual.net...
> >> kilikini wrote:
> >>
> >>
> >> > I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
> >> > of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.
> >>
> >>
> >> Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Brian
> >>
> >
> >Yep, too true, Brian.
> >
> >kili
> >
>
> Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
> think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
> here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
> Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
> driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
> telling us how you did it where you used to be.
>
> As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
> sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.
>
>
> Pan Ohco
>

....see ya........

The Joneses

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Kathi Jones wrote:

> "Pan Ohco" <ohco@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:k15lm1toc3evhu72a7bbitu38f7sjd54td@4ax.com...
> > On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:25:07 GMT, kilikini wrote:
> >
> > >
> > >"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> > >news:3svf45FqciqhU1@individual.net...
> > >> kilikini wrote:
> > >> > I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
> > >> > of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.
> > >>
> > >>
> > >> Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.
> > >> Brian
> > >>
> > >Yep, too true, Brian.
> > >kili
> >
> > Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
> > think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
> > here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
> > Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
> > driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
> > telling us how you did it where you used to be.
> > As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
> > sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.
> > Pan Ohco
> >
> ...see ya........

It's my opinion that it's not where yer feet are at, it's where yer head is at.
Edrena

Terry Pulliam Burd

On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:28:58 GMT, "kilikini"
<kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
opined:

>The only "good" thing I can say about my move to Florida is that I live in a
>concrete block house that has withstood plenty of hurricanes. If I had my
>way, I'd be back in California, Oregon, Washington or Hawaii in a heartbeat.
>I live in Cesspool, Swampy, Cowtown Florida. There is no deli, no theater,
>no seafood and no decent restaurants. All we have are geriatric clinics and
>bugs. It's seriously miserable.

I am truly sorry that you're miserable in Florida, but as an old Air
Force Brat, who lived in a few seriously miserable places growing up,
you need to get your mind right <g> I was only as unhappy as I allowed
myself to be - and I'm tellin' ya, I lived in a place where, had you
written me a letter, would have been addressed to: The Upper Stables,
Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.

You aren't living in a stable, are you?

Terry "Squeaks" Pulliam Burd
AAC(F)BV66.0748.CA

"If the soup had been as hot as the claret, if the claret had been as
old as the bird, and if the bird's breasts had been as full as the
waitress's, it would have been a very good dinner."

-- Duncan Hines

To reply, replace "spaminator" with "cox"

Wayne Boatwright

On Thu 03 Nov 2005 09:24:18p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
rec.food.cooking:

> On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:28:58 GMT, "kilikini"
> <kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
> opined:
>
>>The only "good" thing I can say about my move to Florida is that I live
>>in a concrete block house that has withstood plenty of hurricanes. If I
>>had my way, I'd be back in California, Oregon, Washington or Hawaii in a
>>heartbeat. I live in Cesspool, Swampy, Cowtown Florida. There is no
>>deli, no theater, no seafood and no decent restaurants. All we have are
>>geriatric clinics and bugs. It's seriously miserable.
>
> I am truly sorry that you're miserable in Florida, but as an old Air
> Force Brat, who lived in a few seriously miserable places growing up,
> you need to get your mind right <g> I was only as unhappy as I allowed
> myself to be - and I'm tellin' ya, I lived in a place where, had you
> written me a letter, would have been addressed to:

> The Upper Stables,
> Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.

Actually, that sounds kinda neat, Terry!

>
> You aren't living in a stable, are you?
>
> Terry "Squeaks" Pulliam Burd
> AAC(F)BV66.0748.CA
>
> "If the soup had been as hot as the claret, if the claret had been as
> old as the bird, and if the bird's breasts had been as full as the
> waitress's, it would have been a very good dinner."
>
> -- Duncan Hines
>
> To reply, replace "spaminator" with "cox"
>

--
Wayne Boatwright *�*
_____________________________________________

A chicken in every pot is a *LOT* of chicken!

Advocate

>
> Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
> think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
> here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
> Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
> driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
> telling us how you did it where you used to be.
>
> As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
> sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.
>
>
> Pan Ohco
>

I like Florida and now I like Pan. I wish I were sharing a mint julep with
you.

Joe Cilinceon

As someone that was born and spent most of my life in Florida all I can say
is, I'll never go back, not even to visit. I left over a year ago and
nothing would temp me to return.

--

Joe Cilinceon

kilikini

"Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
news:Xns9703DAF68C084waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
> On Thu 03 Nov 2005 09:24:18p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
> rec.food.cooking:
>
> > On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:28:58 GMT, "kilikini"
> > <kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
> > opined:
> >
> >>The only "good" thing I can say about my move to Florida is that I live
> >>in a concrete block house that has withstood plenty of hurricanes. If I
> >>had my way, I'd be back in California, Oregon, Washington or Hawaii in a
> >>heartbeat. I live in Cesspool, Swampy, Cowtown Florida. There is no
> >>deli, no theater, no seafood and no decent restaurants. All we have are
> >>geriatric clinics and bugs. It's seriously miserable.
> >
> > I am truly sorry that you're miserable in Florida, but as an old Air
> > Force Brat, who lived in a few seriously miserable places growing up,
> > you need to get your mind right <g> I was only as unhappy as I allowed
> > myself to be - and I'm tellin' ya, I lived in a place where, had you
> > written me a letter, would have been addressed to:
>
> > The Upper Stables,
> > Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.
>
> Actually, that sounds kinda neat, Terry!
>
>

I was kind of thinking the same thing, Wayne! LOL.

kili

Denny Wheeler

On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 21:42:12 GMT, "kilikini"
<kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> wrote:

>I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool of the
>United States. I absolutely hate it here.

I visited Miami in the early 80s. In early December, for a week. I
have a few memories. Bugs. humidity. bugs. Lotsa crime. bugs.
Rain that could knock you down. Did I mention the bugs?

I didn't leave anything behind to go back for.

I see you're in Tampa Bay area? Assuming you're under 75, you're
lowering the average age. (or so my friend Jack Lipton a/k/a 'Soup'
tells me)

--
-denny-
"Do your thoughts call ahead or do they just arrive at your mouth unannounced?"

"It's come as you are, baby."

-over the hedge

maxine in ri

If your porch is anything like the one at the Leu homestead, I'll kick
back and join you. the rest of Florida I can live without.

maxine in ri
whose relatives _did_ get a visit in August.

Pan Ohco

On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 04:56:36 GMT, Advocate wrote:

>
>>
>> Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
>> think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
>> here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
>> Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
>> driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
>> telling us how you did it where you used to be.
>>
>> As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
>> sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.
>>
>>
>> Pan Ohco
>>
>
>I like Florida and now I like Pan. I wish I were sharing a mint julep with
>you.
>
Y'all come on over now ! If I don't have juleps, I have wild turkey.

Pan Ohco

Terry Pulliam Burd

On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 09:15:55 GMT, "kilikini"
<kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
opined:

>
>"Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
>news:Xns9703DAF68C084waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
>> On Thu 03 Nov 2005 09:24:18p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
>> rec.food.cooking:
>
>>> I lived in a place where, had you
>> > written me a letter, would have been addressed to:
>>
>> > The Upper Stables,
>> > Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.
>>
>> Actually, that sounds kinda neat, Terry!
>>
>>
>
>I was kind of thinking the same thing, Wayne! LOL.

HA! It was housing converted by the US government from a stable mews
that dated from the 17th century. No money was overspent on its
renovation. We had one huge room that served as living room, dining
room and kitchen that boasted of a really big electricity converter,
hot plate and small refrigerator. The bathroom was also huge and had
one of those big double sinks you see in laundry rooms, a two stall
toilet and a shower. Three large bedrooms that had no closets, just
four walls and government issued furniture.

And the windows had no screens, so one summer night when all the small
mullioned windows were open, a bird flew in. I chased it around with
my tennis racket trying to "herd" it out...and then realized it was a
bat.

And did I mention that it had been a stable? And had housed 3
centuries of horses?

"Neat," my rear end!

Terry "Squeaks" Pulliam Burd
AAC(F)BV66.0748.CA

"If the soup had been as hot as the claret, if the claret had been as
old as the bird, and if the bird's breasts had been as full as the
waitress's, it would have been a very good dinner."

-- Duncan Hines

To reply, replace "spaminator" with "cox"

Wayne Boatwright

On Fri 04 Nov 2005 09:02:58p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in rec.food.cooking:

> Newsgroups: rec.food.cooking
> Subject: Re: [FW: You knoow you live in Florida when:
> From: Terry Pulliam Burd <ntpulliam@spaminator.net>
>
> On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 09:15:55 GMT, "kilikini"
> <kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
> opined:
>
>>
>>"Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
>>news:Xns9703DAF68C084waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
>>> On Thu 03 Nov 2005 09:24:18p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
>>> rec.food.cooking:
>>
>>>> I lived in a place where, had you written me a letter, would have
>>>> been addressed to:
>>>
>>> > The Upper Stables,
>>> > Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.
>>>
>>> Actually, that sounds kinda neat, Terry!
>>>
>>>
>>
>>I was kind of thinking the same thing, Wayne! LOL.
>
> HA! It was housing converted by the US government from a stable mews
> that dated from the 17th century. No money was overspent on its
> renovation. We had one huge room that served as living room, dining
> room and kitchen that boasted of a really big electricity converter,
> hot plate and small refrigerator. The bathroom was also huge and had
> one of those big double sinks you see in laundry rooms, a two stall
> toilet and a shower. Three large bedrooms that had no closets, just
> four walls and government issued furniture.
>
> And the windows had no screens, so one summer night when all the small
> mullioned windows were open, a bird flew in. I chased it around with
> my tennis racket trying to "herd" it out...and then realized it was a
> bat.
>
> And did I mention that it had been a stable? And had housed 3
> centuries of horses?
>
> "Neat," my rear end!

ROTFLMAO! So much for romanticizing an image! :-)

Here I was picturing an ancient but quaint and lovely apartment above a
stable, perhaps Tudor design, with all the trappings of an English country
cottage.

--
Wayne Boatwright *�*
_____________________________________________

A chicken in every pot is a *LOT* of chicken!

Dan Abel

In article <51bom1lrch01jbvk9a4lpoce8q7nsdvj8b@4ax.com>,
Terry Pulliam Burd <ntpulliam@spaminator.net> wrote:

> room and kitchen that boasted of a really big electricity converter,

Not a term I've ever heard of. What did it convert the electricity into
(or from)? I'm guessing it was a heater, but not sure. When my sister
lived in England, their heater was coin-operated.

--
Dan Abel
dabel@sonic.net
Petaluma, California, USA

kilikini

"Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
news:Xns9704D94B5F823waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
> On Fri 04 Nov 2005 09:02:58p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
rec.food.cooking:
>
> > Newsgroups: rec.food.cooking
> > Subject: Re: [FW: You knoow you live in Florida when:
> > From: Terry Pulliam Burd <ntpulliam@spaminator.net>
> >
> > On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 09:15:55 GMT, "kilikini"
> > <kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
> > opined:
> >
> >>
> >>"Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
> >>news:Xns9703DAF68C084waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
> >>> On Thu 03 Nov 2005 09:24:18p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
> >>> rec.food.cooking:
> >>
> >>>> I lived in a place where, had you written me a letter, would have
> >>>> been addressed to:
> >>>
> >>> > The Upper Stables,
> >>> > Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.
> >>>
> >>> Actually, that sounds kinda neat, Terry!
> >>>
> >>>
> >>
> >>I was kind of thinking the same thing, Wayne! LOL.
> >
> > HA! It was housing converted by the US government from a stable mews
> > that dated from the 17th century. No money was overspent on its
> > renovation. We had one huge room that served as living room, dining
> > room and kitchen that boasted of a really big electricity converter,
> > hot plate and small refrigerator. The bathroom was also huge and had
> > one of those big double sinks you see in laundry rooms, a two stall
> > toilet and a shower. Three large bedrooms that had no closets, just
> > four walls and government issued furniture.
> >
> > And the windows had no screens, so one summer night when all the small
> > mullioned windows were open, a bird flew in. I chased it around with
> > my tennis racket trying to "herd" it out...and then realized it was a
> > bat.
> >
> > And did I mention that it had been a stable? And had housed 3
> > centuries of horses?
> >
> > "Neat," my rear end!
>
> ROTFLMAO! So much for romanticizing an image! :-)
>
> Here I was picturing an ancient but quaint and lovely apartment above a
> stable, perhaps Tudor design, with all the trappings of an English country
> cottage.
>
> --
>

You and I think alike, Wayne. I was picturing the same thing. Sorry,
Terry!

kili

Wayne Boatwright

On Sat 05 Nov 2005 02:23:43a, kilikini wrote in rec.food.cooking:

>
> "Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
> news:Xns9704D94B5F823waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
>> On Fri 04 Nov 2005 09:02:58p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
>> rec.food.cooking:
>>
>> > Newsgroups: rec.food.cooking
>> > Subject: Re: [FW: You knoow you live in Florida when:
>> > From: Terry Pulliam Burd <ntpulliam@spaminator.net>
>> >
>> > On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 09:15:55 GMT, "kilikini"
>> > <kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> rummaged among random neurons and
>> > opined:
>> >
>> >>
>> >>"Wayne Boatwright" <waynesgang@waynes.gang> wrote in message
>> >>news:Xns9703DAF68C084waynesgang@217.22.228.19...
>> >>> On Thu 03 Nov 2005 09:24:18p, Terry Pulliam Burd wrote in
>> >>> rec.food.cooking:
>> >>
>> >>>> I lived in a place where, had you written me a letter, would have
>> >>>> been addressed to:
>> >>>
>> >>> > The Upper Stables,
>> >>> > Greenham Close, Near Newbury, Berkshire, England.
>> >>>
>> >>> Actually, that sounds kinda neat, Terry!
>> >>>
>> >>>
>> >>
>> >>I was kind of thinking the same thing, Wayne! LOL.
>> >
>> > HA! It was housing converted by the US government from a stable mews
>> > that dated from the 17th century. No money was overspent on its
>> > renovation. We had one huge room that served as living room, dining
>> > room and kitchen that boasted of a really big electricity converter,
hot
>> > plate and small refrigerator. The bathroom was also huge and had one
of
>> > those big double sinks you see in laundry rooms, a two stall toilet
and
>> > a shower. Three large bedrooms that had no closets, just four walls
and
>> > government issued furniture.
>> >
>> > And the windows had no screens, so one summer night when all the small
>> > mullioned windows were open, a bird flew in. I chased it around with
>> > my tennis racket trying to "herd" it out...and then realized it was a
>> > bat.
>> >
>> > And did I mention that it had been a stable? And had housed 3
>> > centuries of horses?
>> >
>> > "Neat," my rear end!
>>
>> ROTFLMAO! So much for romanticizing an image! :-)
>>
>> Here I was picturing an ancient but quaint and lovely apartment above a
>> stable, perhaps Tudor design, with all the trappings of an English
country
>> cottage.
>>
>> --
>>
>
> You and I think alike, Wayne. I was picturing the same thing. Sorry,
> Terry!
>
> kili

I guess I've watched too many movies from the 1930s-1940s. :-) Although
the veritable English cottage does still exist.

--
Wayne Boatwright *�*
_____________________________________________

A chicken in every pot is a *LOT* of chicken!

~patches~

Dan Abel wrote:

> In article <51bom1lrch01jbvk9a4lpoce8q7nsdvj8b@4ax.com>,
> Terry Pulliam Burd <ntpulliam@spaminator.net> wrote:
>
>
>
>>room and kitchen that boasted of a really big electricity converter,
>
>
>
> Not a term I've ever heard of. What did it convert the electricity into
> (or from)? I'm guessing it was a heater, but not sure. When my sister
> lived in England, their heater was coin-operated.
>

Here's my experience with converters/inverters. We had a lg travel
trailer so had this equipment and I'm tinkering with solar power. If
the power is DC (battery power) you need to convert it to AC (household
outlets) to use appliances. So if the power is solar, it charges the
batteries then in order to use a plug in appliance you need a converter
to convert the power to AC. This is likely as clear as mud. Here's a
link -
http://van.hep.uiuc.edu/van/qa/sect...11128202533.htm

Sheldon

The Joneses wrote:
> Kathi Jones wrote:
>
> > "Pan Ohco" <ohco@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> > news:k15lm1toc3evhu72a7bbitu38f7sjd54td@4ax.com...
> > > On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:25:07 GMT, kilikini wrote:
> > >
> > > >
> > > >"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> > > >news:3svf45FqciqhU1@individual.net...
> > > >> kilikini wrote:
> > > >> > I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
> > > >> > of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.
> > > >>
> > > >>
> > > >> Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.
> > > >> Brian
> > > >>
> > > >Yep, too true, Brian.
> > > >kili
> > >
> > > Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
> > > think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
> > > here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
> > > Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
> > > driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
> > > telling us how you did it where you used to be.
> > > As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
> > > sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.
> > > Pan Ohco
> > >
> > ...see ya........
>
> It's my opinion that it's not where yer feet are at, it's where yer head is at.

Should I? hehe

Sheldon

treeline12345@yahoo.com

Denny Wheeler wrote:
> On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 21:42:12 GMT, "kilikini"
> <kilikini@NOSPAMtampabay.rr.com> wrote:
>
> >I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool of the
> >United States. I absolutely hate it here.
>
> I visited Miami in the early 80s. In early December, for a week. I
> have a few memories. Bugs. humidity. bugs. Lotsa crime. bugs.
> Rain that could knock you down. Did I mention the bugs?
>
> I didn't leave anything behind to go back for.
>
> I see you're in Tampa Bay area? Assuming you're under 75, you're
> lowering the average age. (or so my friend Jack Lipton a/k/a 'Soup'
> tells me)

I visited Key West and Miami. I was really surprised by the ignorance
of the locals in Key West. Although parts are somewhat swift, there was
a real Faulkner type of mentality down there, like something out of his
novels, especially Yoknapatawapha County. Can you imagine an older
adult slow dancing with a 13 year old in the middle of the street?
In-breeding. And Miami? I was there when killing tourists seemed to be
the highlight of the week, with forcing rental cars to stop and then
attacking the people inside. Because of these killings, the rental cars
now don't sport license plates that identified them as rental cars. I
loved Parrot World in Miami but the rest of the city seemed like a bad
bus ride.

On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 11:12:31 -0600, Pan Ohco wrote:

> On Fri, 04 Nov 2005 04:56:36 GMT, Advocate wrote:

> >I like Florida and now I like Pan. I wish I were sharing a mint julep with
> >you.
> >
> Y'all come on over now ! If I don't have juleps, I have wild turkey.
>
I haven't been to Florida in years, but I'd return someday... not to
live - I'd be visiting and I'd drop by to hoist a few with you!

The Joneses

Newsgroups: rec.food.cooking,rec.food.preserving
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Sheldon wrote:

> The Joneses wrote:
> > It's my opinion that it's not where yer feet are at, it's where yer head is at.
>
> Should I? hehe
> Sheldon

Nah - Ah'm so simple, it would fly raht past me.
E.

Dan Abel

In article <1131204333.861769.248430@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
"treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:

> novels, especially Yoknapatawapha County. Can you imagine an older
> adult slow dancing with a 13 year old in the middle of the street?

Yes. Sounds pretty nice. Would you rather they went off into the
bushes? How about another 13 YO and the two of them go off in the
bushes, with maybe no knowledge about birth control?

I have very fond memories of dancing with a very young girl. She was
just in heaven. It was called a father/daughter dance, and was a Girl
Scout function.

--
Dan Abel
dabel@sonic.net
Petaluma, California, USA

treeline12345@yahoo.com

Dan Abel wrote:
> In article <1131204333.861769.248430@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
> "treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
>
> > novels, especially Yoknapatawapha County. Can you imagine an older
> > adult slow dancing with a 13 year old in the middle of the street?
>
>
> Yes. Sounds pretty nice. Would you rather they went off into the
> bushes? How about another 13 YO and the two of them go off in the
> bushes, with maybe no knowledge about birth control?
>
>
> I have very fond memories of dancing with a very young girl. She was
> just in heaven. It was called a father/daughter dance, and was a Girl
> Scout function.
>
> --
> Dan Abel
> dabel@sonic.net
> Petaluma, California, USA

Uh this was 2am in the morning outside a popular bar and if it were
your daughter with a non-relative adult male, would you still say the
same? This was not a girl scout function. It was a sexual dance, dirty
dancing. They don't usually have father-daughter girl scout functions
outside a bar in the street at 2am, or do they? I gather you don't know
about Key West then? Now you do.

Dan Abel

In article <1131255437.836032.26030@g44g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
"treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:

> Dan Abel wrote:
> > In article <1131204333.861769.248430@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
> > "treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:

> > > novels, especially Yoknapatawapha County. Can you imagine an older
> > > adult slow dancing with a 13 year old in the middle of the street?

> > Yes. Sounds pretty nice. Would you rather they went off into the
> > bushes? How about another 13 YO and the two of them go off in the
> > bushes, with maybe no knowledge about birth control?

> > I have very fond memories of dancing with a very young girl. She was
> > just in heaven. It was called a father/daughter dance, and was a Girl
> > Scout function.

> Uh this was 2am in the morning outside a popular bar and if it were
> your daughter with a non-relative adult male, would you still say the
> same? This was not a girl scout function. It was a sexual dance, dirty
> dancing. They don't usually have father-daughter girl scout functions
> outside a bar in the street at 2am, or do they? I gather you don't know
> about Key West then? Now you do.

Of course, I wasn't there. Maybe this was a Bad Thing. I don't know,
really.

I bought the movie, "Dirty Dancing" many years back. DVDs hadn't been
invented yet, and VCR tapes just got reasonable. I think it was
US$19.99. I don't know why I bought it, it was an impulse purchase. My
girl scout and I watched it many times. She sat on my lap and we had
major cuddles. Some of the stuff in the movie really wasn't
appropriate, but it seemed to go right over the top of her head. It was
a movie that was appropriate at two levels. We really weren't seeing
the same movie.

We didn't watch it for a long time, and then I found it in back of our
tapes. We watched it again and she was just blown away. Those things
that had just gone over her head before now made more sense.

Like I posted, I wasn't there. If this really was a sexual thing with
an older male and an underage person, what did the police do after they
got there after you called them? You *did* call them, didn't you?

--
Dan Abel
dabel@sonic.net
Petaluma, California, USA

-L.

The Joneses wrote:
> Was too funny to pass up - recieved from DS in Miami:
>
> YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN FLORIDA WHEN:

You don't have a ******* brain?

Just a guess.

-L.

George Shirley

Pan Ohco wrote:

> On Thu, 03 Nov 2005 22:25:07 GMT, kilikini wrote:
>
>
>>"Default User" <defaultuserbr@yahoo.com> wrote in message
>>news:3svf45FqciqhU1@individual.net...
>>
>>>kilikini wrote:
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>>I moved to Florida a year ago and I have to agree. It's the cesspool
>>>>of the United States. I absolutely hate it here.
>>>
>>>
>>>Made all the worse by where you moved from, I should imagine.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>Brian
>>>
>>
>>Yep, too true, Brian.
>>
>>kili
>>
>
>
> Your are all so right. It is terrible down here on the gulf coast. I
> think that you should all move north, or west or any place away from
> here. Leave us here all by ourselves.
> Maybe we could get back to a slower pace of life.Fewer New Yorker,
> driving like nuts. and you know we could not get along without you all
> telling us how you did it where you used to be.
>
> As you drive past, on your way out of town. Just wave at poor old Pan,
> sitting on the porch drinking a mint julep.
>
>
> Pan Ohco
>
I'm with you Pan. Lived on the Gulf Coast all my 66 years except the
times I was in the military or working in the Middle East. Wouldn't
trade the Middle Coast for the Left or Right Coasts. You gotta grow up
here to appreciate the heat, humidity, hurricanes, lots of rain, gators
and snakes, and good people (mostly), that's excepting N'awlins of
course, they could fill it in and build a new port on the landfill and
it wouldn't bother me.

George

Sheldon

kilikini

treeline12345@yahoo.com

Dan Abel wrote:
> In article <1131255437.836032.26030@g44g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
> "treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> > Dan Abel wrote:
> > > In article <1131204333.861769.248430@g47g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
> > > "treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> > > > novels, especially Yoknapatawapha County. Can you imagine an older
> > > > adult slow dancing with a 13 year old in the middle of the street?
>
> > > Yes. Sounds pretty nice. Would you rather they went off into the
> > > bushes? How about another 13 YO and the two of them go off in the
> > > bushes, with maybe no knowledge about birth control?
>
> > > I have very fond memories of dancing with a very young girl. She was
> > > just in heaven. It was called a father/daughter dance, and was a Girl
> > > Scout function.
>
> > Uh this was 2am in the morning outside a popular bar and if it were
> > your daughter with a non-relative adult male, would you still say the
> > same? This was not a girl scout function. It was a sexual dance, dirty
> > dancing. They don't usually have father-daughter girl scout functions
> > outside a bar in the street at 2am, or do they? I gather you don't know
> > about Key West then? Now you do.
>
> Of course, I wasn't there. Maybe this was a Bad Thing. I don't know,
> really.
>
>
> I bought the movie, "Dirty Dancing" many years back. DVDs hadn't been
> invented yet, and VCR tapes just got reasonable. I think it was
> US$19.99. I don't know why I bought it, it was an impulse purchase. My
> girl scout and I watched it many times. She sat on my lap and we had
> major cuddles. Some of the stuff in the movie really wasn't
> appropriate, but it seemed to go right over the top of her head. It was
> a movie that was appropriate at two levels. We really weren't seeing
> the same movie.
>
> We didn't watch it for a long time, and then I found it in back of our
> tapes. We watched it again and she was just blown away. Those things
> that had just gone over her head before now made more sense.
>
>
> Like I posted, I wasn't there. If this really was a sexual thing with
> an older male and an underage person, what did the police do after they
> got there after you called them? You *did* call them, didn't you?
>
> --
> Dan Abel
> dabel@sonic.net
> Petaluma, California, USA

Call the police in Key West on a local? Are you serious? It's the
South. It's like one of those sad movies where a town is controlled by
one family. Most tourists don't pick up on this deep, deep Southern
corruption. The name of the family was Conch, as I recall, mainly
recall because of the sea shell connection.

In any case, they were drinking and hanging out. Other people were
dancing in the street. If she were drinking, that would be a reason to
call the police. I don't remember if she was drinking or not. What was
disturbing was that this was considered "normal."

I think your point was that it could have been innocent. Unlikely. As I
said, it was like something out of Faulkner. The fellow had on an
expensive seersucker suit and appeared wealthy, sort of like faded
gentry. The girl was extremely young looking, certainly under 16,
whether 13 or 14 or 12 I don't know. Age of consent is 16 in Florida,
so calling the police? I never saw a policeman when I was down there.

When I was there, they published on the front page the assertion that
there were too many Jewish people or Israelis in Key West. I'm not
kidding. They complained that they were causing the real estate prices
to rise! Can you believe that? They, the Israelis on Duval Street, were
making the real estate prices go higher so they blamed that on the
Jewish on the front page of the local newspaper.

Nice place, real Southern hospitality. That kind of blew me away. This
was in February 1993. You might think it was 1893. Retards. Nice town.
Pretty sailboats. But rotten beneath the core. Too bad. Nice weather.
Pretty women but a bit sad.

Default User

Ranee Mueller

In article <1131255437.836032.26030@g44g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>,
"treeline12345@yahoo.com" <treeline12345@yahoo.com> wrote:

> Uh this was 2am in the morning outside a popular bar and if it were
> your daughter with a non-relative adult male, would you still say the
> same? This was not a girl scout function. It was a sexual dance, dirty
> dancing. They don't usually have father-daughter girl scout functions
> outside a bar in the street at 2am, or do they? I gather you don't know
> about Key West then? Now you do.

There's a whole lot of garbage that goes on in Key West, and it isn't
all the backward folks doing it, there's plenty going on with the
progressive folks, too. Ill behavior and criminal activity are not the
sole possession of backwater people.

Regards,
Ranee

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